I arrived covered in chocolate, courtesy of the chav spawn that was behind me.
Chav Mum had ‘it’ in her lap but let ‘it’ touch and smear itself over everything and everyone.
As Schnee has mentioned before, “We”, the British, don’t really appreciate the children of strangers.
I’m sure it has something to do with the Reformation.
Catholic types have a more laissez faire attitude to kids.
The more the merrier and of course they are allowed in the bar.
For Protestants, if they are not up a chimney or down a mine, they need to be seen and not heard; and sit outside the bar with a coke and a bag of crisps.
Castell Crisp-e has a really old and well established apple tree.
With permission, I had a bit of a ‘scrump’.
Three carrier bags full.
Apple sauce will be made by me and apple pies by Housemate Claire.
This is when I got injured.
I’d had to get ‘inside’ the tree to pick some of the fruit and in my haste to get out I scraped myself against a brutal branch.
This happened.
I swear it stung for three hours!
I am a seriously sick fucker! I am aware of this.
But this makes me laugh.
Lots!
Tell me you don’t hear that mechanical ‘Simon Says’ voice in your head when you look at it!
2 comments:
Oh no!!!! That's excellent. Who knew there was something cool that could be done with Lego.
The reason we British don't appreciate other ppl's kids is because we have high standards. We don't think they're cute just because they're kids, they have to actually BE cute, therefore it's much more of a compliment if a Brit finds your kid to be tolerable. (In much the same way that celebs in Britain don't get worshipped for their celebdom, they have to actually be GOOD at whatever it is).
I LOVE Lego! Love it!
I find very few children 'tolerable' and even less 'cute'!
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