Check out my birthday cake!
Housemate Claire made it for me.
‘Nutella Cake’!
It is beyond fecking Yum and is Coeliac friendly.
I had a great birthday and some cracking gifts.
Books, book tokens, speciality vodka, wine and a day Clay Pigeon shooting!
Oh! Yes! I will be ARMED!
The main celebration is on Saturday.
My Father is leaving his house, the Nottingham contingent are coming south, the locals are mobilised and the Irish are flying in.
It should be epic!
If my niece wrote a blog I think her post yesterday would go something like this:
I popped into see the mad lesbian auntie this afternoon.
She opened the door with her ear on her right shoulder.
‘Oh! Have you got a crick in your neck?’ I asked.
“Darling! Come in! Come in! No! Hydrogen Peroxide in my ear” she cheerfully told me, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
The scene that greeted me in the front room was, well, carnage.
It looked like the sofa had been sexually assaulted.
Half the covers were off, cushions were all over the floor and the cat was looking traumatized.
‘Oh Dear! What happened?’
“Oh? This? At 2 this morning I decided to wash all the covers, forgetting that getting it undressed is a lot easier than getting its clothes back on!”
I laughed.
“I’ve cried in frustration then kicked the shit out of it” she said.
Her head was still tilted.
‘And what’s with the Peroxide?’ I asked.
“Cleaning the wax out of my ear. There’s a huge lump in there and it won’t shift. This shit is sizzling the fuck out of it!”
I left the house laughing and laughed all the way to the car.
I’m sure at some point during her drive home she put her hand on her baby bump and thought, ‘Please G-d, don’t let it have any of her DNA!’.
Bi Polar Grandfather, Asperger’s Great Aunt, you’d hope something balanced would be coming from the Dad’s side.
His Mum is adopted and they have no clue to her background!
Yeee Ha!
Baby Russian Roulette!
At last we have a government.. Or something that is doing an impression of one.
So the ‘Tactical’ vote for the Liberal Democrats, to keep the Tories out, like they fucking told us to do, was totally pointless then?
They will NEVER get a vote from me again. Not even for the local council.
Clegg’s name has been mentioned so often in the last three days I was convinced Capello would name him in his World Cup Squad.
Isn’t Democracy fucking grand?
Thirdly, present the meat. In this case, lamb shanks. Crisp-e had already performed some alchemy on these. He'd have to tell you what that was though! It involved herbs and four hours of cooking.
Skewer the shanks and get them over the coals.
Cover with the homemade 'Tandoor'. A terracotta pot with something heavy dropped through the bottom.
The meat was served up in warm tortillas, salad and a mint sauce. There are no photos of this as they didn't last that long!
If we can ignore for the moment that I have shoulders like Mark Spitz, this is an hour of shirtless weeding in the Mansions garden today. 
