Thursday, March 27, 2008

How Rage Begins

Being the "techno 'tard" that I am, what to others are simple tasks, to me are pure Hell.
I'll keep it as simple as I can (For my benefit)

Apple has Bluetooth.
Phone has Bluetooth.
I want to Bluetooth stuff to the apple.
Have attempted connection.
Boxes pop up about authorising.
I authorise.
Fuck all happens.
No bluetoothing occurs.
I try 4 or 5 times.
Nothing happens.
Short fuse ignited.
Constant banging, scraping and building work next door.
Still no bluetoothing.
Short fuse nearing crisis point.
Banging so loud and hard, stuff is moving in my house.
Sawing. Sawing. Sawing. Sawing.

Remember those kids spinning tops you got going by pushing a handle in and out of the top?
That is what the ball of molten anger was doing in the pit of my stomach.
Pointless anger management strategies are as follows…

Take deep breaths….. No. Makes top spin faster.
Counting…. No. makes me count hammer blows. Makes top spin faster.
Remove self from situation… No. Can be heard everywhere in the house. Makes top spin faster.
Relaxing starting at the feet… No. Floor is vibrating with blows, causing me to count… Makes top spin faster.
No relief.

I calmed down when a friend arrived and told me her fantastic news.
The child she gave up for adoption in 1972 is looking for her.
She was so delighted and happy that the anger went!
So did the builders.
A smoke and huge mug of tea helped as well.

4 comments:

Sassygril said...

Wow, that's amazing. I really hope that your friend and her child can connect in some way. That would be wonderful.

And I DID wonder what state of rage you would be in given that it looks as though your neighbours are fair gutting their abode. Retaliate by scraping the railings. Worked last time, no?

Sleepy said...

Don't mention the Railings!

Crisp-e said...

That is good news for your friend.

Mate, I totally understand the rage thing. The one thing that worked totally and utterly for me was smashing up the offending piece of hardware! An old printer of mine had given me problems for about two years. Finally, as one last act of manipulation and cruelty, it packed up on the day of the GCSE exams as I was attempting to print-off a list. I was so furious that I launched it across my classroom.

I didn't get my list but felt instantly better.

Sleepy said...

The problem is not a failing in the technology but my complete retardation when it comes to the Apple!
It's me that needs launching across a room!