Today, drug companies and ‘Health Experts’ are getting on my tits.
The BBC news told me that taking too much Ibruprofen will probably give me a heart attack. Oh Good! I thought. The fucking Alzheimer’s people are telling me it stops ’plaques’ being laid down on my synapses and lessens the chances of that horrific demise. We are told to watch our fat intake, eating bread now causes cancer and Camembert will do hideous things to our cholesterol. SO WHAT? We are not immortal! We are supposed to die. It’s up to your genetics when it happens and what causes it. Generations of your ancestors have already, unknowingly, decided what is going to do for you!
In my heritage, cancer genes have married cancer genes and heart disease has done the same with heart disease. (With a few fat fucker genes thrown in, just for fun.) It’s not going to be any great shock if I’m diagnosed with either. The shock would be NOT having one or the other, making true those childhood dreams that I was adopted! (My REAL family can make themselves known at any time.)
Ok, I agree, you can make changes in your lifestyle to prolong your time. Like, not smoking and doing a bit of exercise. You’ll probably hit 73 rather than the 63 of your predecessors. But something is going to get you so is it worth it?
Stop fucking worrying about it. Just ACCEPT that you are going to die and you might end up living a bit!!
Eeeesh, I’m glad that is out.
My heart went out to Crisp-e today, his first visit to the dentist in many years. When I spoke to him yesterday I could hear the pain in his voice. For me, toothache and earache are probably the two worst pains in the world.
He and ‘Chelle came round this afternoon. He walked in and I gave him a hug, he immediately hooked a finger in the corner of his mouth, yanked it outwards and said,
“Yook!, Ish eye isdom hoof”
I peered in and Ohh-ed and Ahh-ed sympathetically.
Later on I discovered he had bought his OWN dentistry equipment and he disappeared to finish the job he claimed the dentist hadn’t.
‘Chelle’s greeting didn’t involve me looking at her teeth.
While they were here the Discovery Channel had something on about Cannibalism in Extreme Survival cases… Would you eat human flesh if you were starving? Crisp-e would. Even with his painful teeth. He would try it out of curiosity! No starving, extreme conditions involved, just to see what it tasted like. I’d LIKE to say that I wouldn’t, unlike others I’m not a sicko! Not sure of the Kashrut status of ‘Human’ either. I have no objection to being eaten (Who does?!!) by others.
Just to be sure, I’m not going anywhere remotely countryside with Crisp-e ever again. I get the distinct feeling it wouldn’t take much before he was wanting to sample ‘Long Pig’. One wrong turn at Queen Elizabeth Country Park and that fucker would be collecting wood, eyeing people suspiciously and telling us he always carried dried chillis, “Because you never know, man!”.
Not a chance I’m willing to take.
Schnee.. If he visits, DO NOT take him to The Nature Park.
4 comments:
Finally!
Well at least with Crisp-e you know you'll be cooked with organically and hydroponically grown chillies. If I had to eat someone, I'd eat the vegetarian first, but in fact I think I'd rather starve to death.
I'll get the nature Park's Sasquatch and Coyotes trained up in case Crisp-e visits.
I'm less worried about early death than early vegetation.
It took me three years to get an NHS dentist on Portsmouth. Canada doesn't have dentistry on the NHS, but Kev has a good plan from work, so I'm hoping it will be better.
Today's net doctor promises that the common cold can lead to dementia. Personally, I think one or two of the people I worked with at Mayhem can lead to dementia, and it's more certain.
I told him to go to Accident and Emergency. It make take 6 hours to get seen but then they have GOT to deal with you because of government targets.
He saw a NHS bloke who said he had to go to hospital to have his wisdom tooth out and that it will take 3 months!
Its bad enough that, like most, I hate going to the dentist's, but the guy who saw me spoke with such a strong Swiss German accent, I couldn’t help imagining that I was in the company of Dr. Mengele!! "Lie back pleazz and try to keep ztill"!
No gold teeth in your head mate!
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