Wednesday, September 06, 2006

A night on Shooters

I read somewhere today that the Australian Government would give Steve Irwin a state funeral, if his family were up for it.
As you know, my mind works bizarrely and I had an image of a Gun Carriage drawn by 6 Kangaroos. Hopping along to a dirge played by a massed band of didgeridoos (an instrument, which like the bagpipes, are best heard just out of earshot) with supporting Wobble Boards. Brings a tear to your eye doesn’t it? I know! Have laughed all day about that one.
The Gun Carriage morphed into a selection of Antipodean fauna. A Platypus, a Dingo, Kangaroo, a Wallaby, a Koala and an Emu. I contemplated a Croc but I’m not sure how trustworthy they are around the others. Same could be said of the Dingo I suppose. Just have to keep babies and small children away from it.

The Soham murderer, Ian Huntley, has attempted suicide and this has left me in a quandary.
One part of me says, ’Good! Let him do it. One less we have to pay to keep’. Then there is a part that says, ‘No! Keep him alive, let him suffer for what he has done. Trying to take the easy way out. Bastard!’.
So, is that about justice or revenge?
I have really got into a band called Bright Eyes and the lyrics of one song really stuck in my head.
“And in the face of every criminal
Strapped firmly to a chair
We must stare, We must stare, We must stare”

I’m SO glad I have never been called for Jury Service, thank G-d for a juvenile record! I know they tell you it’s wiped at 17, but I don’t believe that for an instant!

Had to ‘frontline’ the felines today. An experience none of us enjoy particularly. They really seem to believe I am trying to kill them and look at me as if I have just pissed on the backs of their necks. I take exception to this as one of the bastards puked on my bed last week, which to them, seems perfectly acceptable. I am with-holding catnip as a punishment. Not that they care, if they got opposable thumbs they’d fuck off tomorrow.

Have been on the Crisp-e special shooters!…. Eeeesh. Amaretto and Cherry Brandy. At least it had no Absinthe in it.
We have decided that after a few of these, the words ‘Slits’, ‘Flange’, ‘Gusset’ and ’Plinth’ take on a sordidly surreal quality.

Aaaaah! The wonders of alcohol.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeehaaaa! Crisp-e special shooters, I'm cheered up just thinking about them.
Liked the lyric, that is so true, so very true.

Sleepy said...

There is another line in the same song that goes,

'while my mother waters plants my father loads his gun'.....

Aaah.. Reminds me of my childhood!

Crisp-e said...

Not quite the specials that include fresh chilli. Whisky took the epithelial layer of cells off of my oesophagus a looooong time ago, therefore it has become a necessity to include chilli into my drinks to........well, just feel again!!!

Sleepy said...

It's all well and good waking up with a banging headache but the added horror of an impending 'ring of fire' is just to much for me!

Anonymous said...

Those chillis do heat up the heiney don't they? My boy Laurence put Lousiana Hot Sauce on everything he eats except shreddies.
For future reference tho, cos I expect the shooters to be lined up for me when I come over in November, I don't like Amaretto because I don't like an almondy flavour.

Sleepy said...

Noted Schnee.. Amaretto will not be on the menu but something dreadfully whisky based will be!

(My word verification is mcnumunu, even sounds like a whisky!)

Anonymous said...

Seeing as you had a hand in killing Mr. Irwin, will you be invited to the state funeral?
- Karen