More Questions Than Answers

I know that it’s wrong but you have got to laugh at this!
My doctor concedes that I have ‘an extraordinary capacity’ for drugs but I’m sure I’d notice some fecker sawing off my leg, no matter how mashed up I was.

Isn’t the word Soothsayer just brilliant?
I have been using ‘Visionary and Dreamer’ when filling in the occupation box on forms but I will be adding Soothsayer.
I may save it for the next census.
The idea that some great, great, great niece or nephew could look through the family history and find that amuses me.
“Bloody Hell! Great Aunt Sleepy was only a fecking Soothsayer!”
Then checking an earlier census to find my religion listed as ‘Jedi Knight’.
They would discover that at the time of the Poll Tax Riots I was occupied as a ‘Sexual Adventurer’.
Fantastic.

I believe it is your duty to lie on questionnaires.
When constructing the surveys they must allow for lying. If nobody lies the results will be skewed.
I’m providing an important service.
Doing it face to face is best, you see an instant reaction.
Next time you are stopped in the street by some fool with a clipboard have some fun.
I have an ‘obvious’ chest so I tell them I’m Male.
When they start to say anything, “Biologically” is added with a whisper!
Lie about kids, pets, ethnic group, income, the lot.
Guarantee you will fly through the questions, if you get started at all; because you don’t have to think about anything and you don’t have to remember your bullshit!

Congratulations to the Hindman tribe and their newest addition, Eleanor.
Mazel Tov!