This morning I went to the dentist for the first of three treatment visits.
Quite possibly my least favourite thing in the world but it had to be done.
I really, really do not like the chair and although my surgeon is an avuncular Irishman, I’ve watched Marathon Man far too many times!
Years of using Smoker’s Toothpaste had taken the enamel off my front teeth; tea, coffee and smokes had stained what remained.
It was horrible.
I was going to have it done ages ago but the cat got ill and the vet mugged me for £600.
I was so happy with the result, that as the enamel was replaced I didn’t even feel the £160 been removed!
Until late afternoon I felt like that Frenchist woman who had the face transplant, numb from the eyes down.
Right now, my complete top jaw aches like a bastard and the gap between my teeth appears slightly larger.
Mrs Next Door With The Kids was overheard asking her husband,
“Which child would you like to punch the lights out of?”
We overlooked the split infinitive because it sounded brilliant in her nice posh accent!
3 comments:
Oh dear, apart from the smoking, all the dental stuff sounds way too familiar, still, 160 squids to have the enamel replaced sounds not too bad. Red wine and coffee are my downfalls.
I don't think that counts as a split infinitive because 'to punch the lights out of someone' is the whole verb, but a bit naughty to end the sentence with a preposition. If she'd been REALLY posh (ie had she been the Queen) she might have amended it to,
'Out of which kid would you like to punch the lights?'
See, THAT is posh.
Hahahaha! Excellent!
I truanted way too many English classes!
I think the majority of my English grammar was learnt at Solent Road Junior Mixed and Infants in Drayton, they really pushed that grammar at ya and at that point, I was waaaay too young to truant.
But it came all came in very handy when I later went to grammar school in Surrey, because then the whole kaboodle came down on you like one big language storm, French, English, Latin, Germish, Spanish.
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