There is a term that my Grandmother used to use that has really stuck with me, and the older I have got the more I have come to understand it.
“There are none more pure than the purified”.
I first understood it when friends started to give up smoking cigarettes. Those people who used to spark up, close their eyes with almost orgasmic pleasure as the nicotine hit their system and say, ‘Oooh, Yes, that’s perfect’. Or words to that effect.
When they give up, all of a sudden you are the personification of evil. They then get all ‘evangelical’ about it. Tell you about the patches and the gum and how much better they feel. Graphically describe what the ‘poison’ is doing to you.
Well, fucking good for you. Count me out!
Then there are those who give up illegal drugs, especially the ’hard’ ones.
Now, they are different. I have nothing but admiration for those people and the horrors they go through. They can bask in their purification.
There is now a new group of ‘body Nazis’. You read about them in the paper, see them on those shit day time talk shows and you’ve probably met a few.
Those who have gone whining to their doctor about excessive hand washing, butterflies in their stomachs when they have to leave the house, or an inability to get on with what the rest of us call ‘Life’. Who, at some point got themselves to believe that because the doctor gave them the stuff it must be good. These people, when the drugs are withdrawn go into total melt down and would have you believe they are having the full on Ewan MacGregor experience from Trainspotting.
Are they bollocks!
A bit of insomnia is usual and maybe Delhi Belly which lasts for 2 weeks, tops.
(Remember, one of the Housemates is a Pharmacist. This may come as a shock, but they know more than the doctors about how medications work on the system.)
Seeing as these people feel it quite acceptable to inflict their point of view on me, for example, I drink so I’m obviously an alcoholic. I smoke dope, so I’m a drug addicted junkie who would burgle your house as soon as look at you. I’m Gay so I obviously want to fuck everything with a pulse and if you believe the Christian Right, that’d be your children.
I think it’s fine for me to air my views.
Get a FUCKING grip!
Take responsibility for yourselves, stop blaming your parents for everything that has gone wrong in your fucked up life and perhaps consider it might just be something to do with you!
You are living it, not them.
Tablets won’t change it, in most cases they do very little, fuck all at all OR make you worse.
Whinging about it won’t change it. Finding G-d won’t change it. Going to ‘meetings’ won’t change it.
If you feel the overwhelming need to ‘blame’ someone, look in the mirror.
Imagine having to be trained that when someone smiles they are not baring their teeth at you, and it’s a friendly gesture.
That when your hand is shaken and a person says,
‘Pleased to meet you’, it’s just a phrase, most times they don’t actually mean it. How frustrating it is when people don’t do what they say or arrive at an arranged time. 9ish, 10ish, means fuck all to me.
That it is really distressing if an item that has always been kept in a certain place is suddenly moved.
Not only remembering books but the page numbers of certain bits. (handy for footnotes in Uni essays!)
Imagine being constantly tested and told your IQ is extremely high, then being treated like a retard because your ‘Social Skills’ are slightly lacking. Put in classes with Window Lickers and kids who can’t spell their name or put their shoes on the right feet.
Forcibly drugged because no one knows what is ’wrong’ or what to do with you and G-d forbid you are ‘yourself’.
Frustration is interpreted as violence.
That stating the obvious is perceived as rudeness or a subliminal request for a beating.
Forcing yourself to look someone in the eye, otherwise you are thought of as shifty and dishonest.
I’ll stop before I fuck up my Chi! But I will leave you with a quote..
“A lunatic is also a man society does not wish to listen to, and whom it is determined to prevent from uttering unbearable truths”.
Antonin Artaud.
4 comments:
I always had a lot of time for Artaud. R.D Laing too. There's not a lot we can do about our parenting or schooling because we were too vulnerable and unknowing - as well as powerless to change aspects of our lives that might have been distressing. But I think that we can try and ensure that the negative aspects of those experiences don't end up running our adult lives. For some people that can be the hardest thing in the world and to achieve even one iota of that is difficult. But like you, I find incessant victimhood and its increasing facilitation by society fucking irritating.
Well, now I will concede straight off that to a certain extent I'm talking out of my backside about this, but it seems to me that we're luckier today with the drugs that are available to us and the way they are prescribed than my mother's generation were.
I had the impression, looking back as an adult rather than at the time, that several of my mother's friends were just given Valium or other quite addictive drugs without any diagnosis very much, as tho it were just to shut them up.
Their generation were also the generation who would be given a full hysterectomy at the first sign of absolutely anything.
I know I always say this, yes, but that doesn't make it not true, but for them, a still predominantly male profession of doctors treated 'female problems', physical or emotional, as a weakness that could be roughly cauterised.
Valium WAS addictive my Grandmother was on them she also had it 'all whipped away'...
My point is that today, because of the litigious society we exist in, the pathology of drugs has changed.
My point is also about those who will go to the doctor and just accept any old shit that is prescribed because it is "The Doctor".
My point is also some people NEED to take some responsibilty for their own lives and situations and not just look for a tablet to make it 'all better'. Then when 'The Doctor' decides they don't need it anymore start looking for another 'crutch' just so they don't have to face up to the fact they are a cunt!
And points taken.
Existentialism always worked for me.
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