Choons And Chocolate

The complete and utter bollocks that is the Eurovision Song Contest was on this evening.
I gave it a huge body swerve.
The only highlight, if it can be called a highlight is hearing Wogan getting steadily more pissed and insulting.
So, with that in mind, my post is mainly music related.

This is my tune of the day. (“Hey! Ebo! Ebo Ebonettes!)
I was about 13 when this came out.
Thank Christ the skipping never took off over here; it was bad enough with ‘Fame’ and fecking leg-warmers.
You will probably hate yourself for tapping your foot to this but I bet you do!
Best pop use of Steel Drums, Ever!
This was a song sung when we were in the car as kids.
5 kids, work tools and a dog in the back of a Robin Reliant, (Ours looked like this but was blue!)
Step Mum and Dad in front.
With Dad moaning,
“Five of ‘em Joon!, Five of the feckers, and not a bastard one of ‘em can carry a fucking tune!”
He’d put up with it for a short time before his knuckles would whiten on the steering wheel and he would roar,
“Shut Up! You Fuckers! My ears will bleed. Joon, Stop Them!”
This would elicit raucous laughter from us!
Superb use of lyrics that you don’t have to pay for.

Another legacy from this time are Chas and Dave.
That song was a particular favourite.
When the car was stolen Dad was livid because he lost their cassette.
Never mentioned the car.
Although none of my siblings care to admit it, we all have their Greatest Hits in our collections.
It is just SO our Dad, and brings back great childhood memories!

This evening has being spent at Mr & Mrs Crisp-e’s.
It’s Mrs Crisp-e’s birthday celebration.
There are way too many Taurean /Gemini types in my circle!
Weirdly, I’m all right with the fellow Taurean’s, it’s the Gemini’s that are the worry!
ATM’s a Gemini.
They half frighten me, half freak me out and if we are using ‘Maury’ stats, they half incite me to violence!

Sweeties have been discussed this evening.
I believe sweeties, ‘Candy’, whatever you call it, is so very personal.
Revels.
Now, Revels are a mixture of all sorts of sweets.
Nastiness sold in a chocolate guise.
Nothing is recognisable other than the Minstrel.
Chocolate blobs.
Fruit hidden in chocolate.
My point was that the ‘Malteser’ used in the Revel mix was basically the ‘spastic malteser’.
The one that was slightly too oddly shaped to make it in to the actual Malteser packet.
The Moomim Malteser.
Now, this is how politically correct we have become.
Referring to a Malteser, A FUCKING SWEETIE, as a spastic stopped conversation dead and brought about gasps.
This was amongst people who have known me for years and know how inept I am!
Spastic is now a word I can’t use with very close friends.

How long will it take for words referring to my sexual preference to become as equally unacceptable?