The Most frustrating moment of the day… Trying to fold a fitted sheet into some sort of manageable size. There’s fuck all you can do with something that has no corners!
That’s why it is screwed up at the back of the airing cupboard now.
The Most frightening moment of the day… Forgetting it was Pension Thursday and going to Somerfield, where I was ‘handled’ by one the elderly.
The need for munchies and fags got me out of the house.
The ‘touching’ occurred during a biscuit cascade.
I went for the most obvious, reachable packet of ginger nuts, removing it caused the shelf to spontaneously empty around me.
I was bent down trying to pick it all up, when I felt a hand, grabbing the bottom of my shirt and then going down the back of my jeans.
I shot up and was ready to start freaking RIGHT out, only to be confronted by an old dear in a wheelchair.
I asked her, as politely as shock would allow, just what the fuck she thought she was doing.
Apparently, she was covering up my back because I would get a chill.
The horrified ‘driver’ was apologising and saying,
“Mum! You can’t just touch people!”, which I must admit, I found amusing.
The Most listened to tune today… The Killers - ‘Can You Read My Mind’.
Great tune, shite video.
I think Mrs Next Door has had enough of it though!
The Most misplaced essential item today… My Zippo, followed by my phone, then the TV remote.
The Most interesting word I have read today… ‘Ziggurat,’ in Karen Armstrong’s, “The History Of G-d”. I finished Cornwell’s the Winter King and this is now my ‘Bog Book’.
The Most superb line in Boston Legal tonight… After being shown the foot of a large black man, expecting to see the foot of a small white man.
Alan Shore says, ‘My friend is looking for something lighter, in a size 8’.
I nearly pissed myself.
8 comments:
I e-mailed Karen Armstrong once, result of some article she wrote in the Guardian.
I remember learning about the Ziggurat in RE at school.
There was a line a few weeks ago in Ugly Betty that was like the Boston Legal one, someone was visiting Wilhelmina and says (about her assistant Mark)
'Love your assistant darling, I have one myself in beige.'
I also learned about Ziggurat's in RE.
The Ziggurat at Ur specifically!
Ziggurat eh, I'm sure I've heard that in a song, or was it a film? hmmm...thats going to bug me all night.
No, I'm talking absolute shite!!! You will love this... its' the Spice Girls line. ''zig-a-zig aaah!!!!
You Wanker!!! Hahahaha!!
That's going to be a 'repeater' mate!
How was Parent's Evening? Hehehe!
lol! Not sure wanker is an appropriate response to that, but I managed to make myself laugh.
Parents eve was the usual affair, only, one parent got fresh with me after I told her that her daughter lacked basic social skills!! True though.
How basic?
Can she ask for the toilet?
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