Never underestimate the ‘soaking’ ability of a lone spoon in the sink.
Somehow it hits you all in one lump and soaks to the skin.
I have had a cold, damp reminder.
Even worse if the spoon is in a mug, this somehow causes a vortex and a directional water spout.
I go through absolute horrors if any of this water hits me in the mouth.
I think it’s the idea that it might be ‘washing up’ water.
Isn’t it amazing how in those situations your mind goes immediately blank.
I grabbed a plate from the drainer to deflect the spray and a knife to poke the spoon out of the way of the stream.
All very Arthurian but why didn’t just turn the fucking tap off?
Luckily, I’ve never had a ‘chip pan’ fire.
At this moment, I know the damp tea towel thing is the treatment.
Faced with one, and using the spoon in the sink as a guide?
You know I’m going to die in that fire!
You can hear the pathologist at the coroner’s court,
“For some reason she had tied a damp tea towel around her face, was wearing one oven glove and was armed with a bin lid and a broom. There is also evidence she poked the fire with the broom handle.”
Verdict.. Death by ‘mind went blank‘.
Sassy and Robbie have been round for food this evening. We have eaten, drunk, smoked loads, chatted, laughed and grooved.
Most agreeable.
The most pointless thing I have seen today.. The sticky ‘re-sealable’ tab on family size bag of Maltesers.
Pah!
The clocks went forward a while ago. Have only just got the central heating right from the last change.
Pain in the arse farmers.
5 comments:
Goddamit! And I was just getting used to only being seven hours behind instead of eight.
As far as the Satanic Spoons problem goes, or rather your response to them and possible chip-pan fires (although I thought chips came from the chippie so that chip-pan fires could be theirs, all theirs)I think the answer is that you just haven't found the right mind-altering drug yet, clearly you're not trying hard enough.
Although I can't imagine it's possible to try too much harder...
Mushrooms that make you think you can fight fires?
No silly, those are the ones you are already taking, these would be the ones that alter your mind so you throw the wet tea towel over the chip pan and do all the right stuff.
Seek and ye shall find.
Jesus! Are you trying to ruin years of practise and self denial?
That's the very reason I do drugs in the first place!
Post a Comment