An amazing day in ‘Norn’ Ireland. Somehow it doesn’t seem real and I’m just waiting for something to kick off.
Ian Paisley and Gerry Adams sat together, singing from the same hymn book, as it were, was really surreal.
What’s that bit from Revelation? When certain things start laying down with others?
Just a thought.
I’ve watched a few different news reports and they do not once make eye contact.
Never, Never, Never!
Paisley has turned in to that bloke from ‘The Vicar Of Dibley‘.
“No,No,No,No….. Yes.”
The NHS in some areas, has got rid of ante-natal and breast feeding classes.
I have to admit that I am totally in the “So Fucking What?” group on this one.
Breast feeding classes for fuck’s sake? How difficult is that?
Uck out a tit and attach the kid by the end that has the eyes, they do the rest.
Humankind has been doing this for millions of years but now some idiot needs fucking lessons!
You have seriously got to doubt Darwin sometimes.
I don’t have kids but I have lots of nieces and nephews.
While my sister was on honeymoon, I looked after my 3 month old niece for three days.
It was all pretty straight forward; feed her, burp her, change her and bathe her.
Until she wouldn’t sleep.
The irony was not lost on ATM and she was fit to burst with a touch of the,
‘Ha! See How You Like It’s’.
I had no problem with that at all. I was awake anyway!
Pompey police seemed to object to me pushing the pram up and down the seafront at 4am though.
I got stopped at least six times in two days.
I really need an idiots guide to tuning a Mandolin.
My Grandfather used to do it for me and him not living forever, has proved a bit of an inconvenience.
I can get it by ear, eventually, but it just takes so frigging long.
The strings make horrible straining, tortured sounds.
I’ve convinced myself that they will snap and slice my eyeball, in an ironic Bunuel-esque tuning accident.
So doing it at arms length, with my face turned slightly away, anticipating blindness, isn’t ideal.
Any suggestions/tips would be gratefully received.
(Don’t suggest electronic tuning devices!)
12 comments:
You nailed it! I thought exactly the same thing. I expected a sermon from the Pope of Unionism, about the evils of Papacy, repentance and all that good schlock, but was sorely disappointed.
The end is surely nigh ... First GAA men handing over the Croker, now this. You can expect crows to start flying backwards, rain to fall upwards and Steve Staunton to acquire a personality any minute now!
Horray for attuned titties! To hell with Treaties!
Lenten... It's the End Of Days!
I'm stocking up for 'The Rapture'! And it better be what I fecking well expect it to be, or there WILL be trouble.
All Hail The Boobies!
but...ante-natal classes help expectant mothers to feel secure in the knowledge that they are doing it "right" even if it is just sticking oh GOD i started think about breast feeding. It is a STRANGE concept.
That's what the women of your family are for!
I have had to run away from many a coven of Aunts and Cousins discussing episiotomy scars, blood loss, 36 hours of agony, cracked nipples and post natal depression.
Breast feeding freaks me out too.
I'm pretty amazed to discover that the Rev Ian Paisley is still alive quite frankly, I half thought he might be a character made up by Dave Allen.
The last paragraph was surreal. I thought a mandolin was what Nigella used to avoid having to do that fancy knife movement stuff.
In my day, two sentences from a midwife were what training in breast-feeding amounted to.
I can't believe you two. Breast-feeding should be weird for us non-lesbians.
The whole thought of breast feeding makes me shudder.
Not in a good way.
I know that's what they are designed for, but.....
I am with the French on this one - your boobs are for you. They might get loaned out for a wee while to a beast whose intentions seem to be somewhat malevolent, but they should be returned to their rightful owner presto pronto. Anyway, I always thought that boobs were designed to look nice in bras - no way were mine ever going to be farmed out to ungrateful wains...
There is a certain amount of bullying that goes with the breast feeding issue.
My sister wasn't treated as nicely as the others when she refused to breast feed, they tried to pressurise and bully her when the family left.
As you can imagine, this went down like a Shit sandwich!
Schnee... I can't believe the Mandolin is surreal! There are instruments all over this house!
You must have played one of them on some drunken evening.
Guitars, Mandolin, Flat back Mandolin, Trumpet, Harmonicas in various keys, Irish Whistles in various keys, a Bodhran (Irish Drum), and assorted 'shakey' things!
Fuck! I've turned into a music teacher... I blame Colin G!
A friend of mine said it best the other night - one of the biggest ironies in new parenthood is your wife now has these giant "funbags" (mimes kneading away at them) but she doesn't want you anywhere near them.
As a new parent, I say hurrah for antenatal and breastfeeding classes. I definitely needed both. No younger siblings or cousins, no extended family in Canada and barely any babysitting experience - I had no clue what to do with a child. Hell, I was surprised we had to feed it in the middle of the night. Good thing the nurse came in to let us know that's why she was crying.
Gail... Are these lessons provided free where you are?
These days there is the internet and friends for extended family!
Sleepy - sometimes free, sometimes not. Free ones are usually funded by grants. I was part of a pilot program that provides midwife, doulah and classes all for free. No way would I trust my friends or the internet as a reliable source of information.
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