Friday, April 13, 2007

One Hit Wonder

After the eye test the day didn’t get any better.
I had an altercation with a driver while out and about on the bike.
That’s a lie actually, I had a fight.
Man in a van pulled out in front of me and I nearly went into his passenger door.
When I shouted,
“TWAT!”, through the open window he was so startled he jumped.
He then had the fucking cheek to pull over, get out and start having a go.
Unfortunately, I was up for it and went back.
Insults were exchanged, then he made the HUGE mistake of trying to grab me by the throat.
There are two reasons not to do this.

1. ATM has been doing that for years, and I have learned to move quickly.
2. I’m an ABA Boxing Tutor.

I was SO angry that he was trying to blame me AND grab me,
I punched him.
I punched him so hard, he was ‘out’ before he hit the deck.
But he scratched me.
Fucking scratched me!
Caught me down my cheek and a bit on my neck.
I’m really indignant about that! The Bitch.
Passers-by came rushing and I fucked off out of it.

I made it to Mr & Mrs Crisp-e’s before my knees went shaky and I started to think about what could’ve happened.
Crisp-e, as ever, had just the right medicine for the job and we tucked into some Calvados!

Then to add insult to injury.
Spurs…. I’m saying no more. It’s too painful.

Karma, is indeed, instant.

7 comments:

Sassygril said...

Jesus.

Sassygril said...

And as for the bloke - well maybe he'll think twice before trying to give a woman a beating.

LentenStuffe said...

Bravo!

For sleepy's KO!

Say no mo!

(G'wan outta that!)

Sleepy said...

Sassy.. I don't think he realised I was female until he'd behaved like a monkey.
You were right in your email though. If he hadn't had a glass jaw, I had NO plan!!

Lenten.. Thank you!

Schneewittchen said...

Bloody hell! How dare he! He was in the wrong in the first place, let's not forget who's the good guy in all this anyway - and it's not the sodding motorist.
Glad you knocked him out. Bastard. Scratched you! He doesn't know who or what he's dealing with. He needs to start surrounding himself with spells and charms.

Crisp-e said...

Good job my gal! As I said to you before, some people just don’t have the intellect to respond in any other way. What you did was remind him of how stupid he is.

Sassygril said...

It's situations like this that worry me. If I'd been Sleepy, I'm sure that I would have said similar. And usually where people have altercations it seems to me it's usually a bit of fuck you and fuck you and people meander on their way. But not in Pompey, oh no. We get afters too. Maybe its me, but when I moved down here 20 years ago, it wasn't like this, so swift to kick off at the slightest perception of insult. Its not uncommon to see people (often couples I have to say) having an absolute ding dong in the middle of the day. They're not pissed even! It really bothers me and is one of the reasons why i'd contemplate leaving the city.