Today, I got incontrovertible proof of something I have known for some time.
G-d hates me.
Not only did I cut myself with the same bastard knife, it used the slightly flappy bit of skin as a guide and got me in exactly the same place.
For an extra chuckle the Supreme Being waited until I was chopping a chilli.
I was bleeding, stinging, swearing and stamping my feet.
I really wanted to kick the shit out of the kitchen cabinets but I’m not at home.
It would have happened there!
I now feel it is safe to assume that knives, like dogs, have to be destroyed once they have tasted human blood.
They can never be trusted again.
It’s not like I’m a complete eejit in the kitchen, I actually enjoy cooking, and on occasion I’m quite good.
Although the knife is not mine, I ditched it anyway!
I’ve thrown away a wok that fell and hit me in the head, so the knife was no problem.
3 comments:
Dunno, but this kinda reminded me of that old saying about blunt blades in Tennessee ... or was it Texas, can't recall right off:
"There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again." —President George W. Bush, Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002
I'm not entirely sure that God spends that much time on you personally. OR she may be testing you. OR maybe you weren't wearing your lucky pinnie that keeps you safe from knife pain, actually, I think that's the most scientific one.
Two words; Anger Management.
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