I had known all day that one of the Housemates was going out tonight.
I mentally prepared and steeled myself for the usual battery of questions.
“Does this go with this? Which shoes? Does my bum look big? Are my ankles fat? In or Out? These earrings with this necklace? Are my boobs level? Did you pack the bag yourself?” Etc.
Not a fecking one.
Instead I got one there was absolutely no preparation for,
“Is my face ok?”
All sorts of stuff whizzed through my mind, so I pulled the childhood ‘get out of washing up trick’ and disappeared to the toilet.
Here, I used my ‘Text Sassy’ option and worked out it was a question about make-up.
I got the reply right and she left in a waft of perfume. The kind you taste rather than smell.
Nice work Sassy.
Am I alone in being freaked out by a woman wearing one flat shoe and one high heel?
Hobbling like one of those people with one leg seriously shorter than the other; then gaining and losing height at second intervals shouting,
“Which? Which? For Christ’s sake WHICH? The taxi! The taxi!”
What I love about this story is that he only took one shoe of each pair.
Inspired!
How fecking infuriating would it be to have just one Manolo or Jimmy Choo?
Or in my case, one Doc Martin and one Nike.
Brilliant!
5 comments:
Glad to be of service :-)
However, if the shoes were only worth 1,000, there can't have been many of them given that the cost of yer jimmis is about 200-450 quid per pair. Trust me, I know these things!
I know you do!
Would never doubt your shoe knowledge!
Ha, but that (Jimmi's and Manolos) reminds me of a wonderful line from Family Guy last night. Lois was criticising him for running awful public access TV shows and he said,
'Well they let Sarah Jessica Parker on TV and she has a face like a foot,'sometimes, you hate yourself, but you just gotta laugh!
Hahaha!!
That's a blinder!
But that's so true! I always found it quite heartening that a so called 'style icon' is actually not all that facially. I like SJP - she seems to have interesting and pertinent things to say. But she has got a face like a foot.
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