Friday, October 26, 2007

Ginger Thoughts

I’ll start with a question.
How, exactly, does this help the cause of Ginger people?
Make that 2 questions.
Do Ginger people have a cause?

I have to confess to being a bit Gingephobic and I have absolutely no idea why I am.
I really shouldn’t be.
My Dad insists that ATM had, what he describes as, ‘Auburn Hair’, when he married her.
I’m hindered by the fact that the few photos that remain of that day are in black and white.
ATM also confesses she hasn’t had her natural colour since 1972.
She didn’t answer the day I came back from a visit to my father and said,
“Hey, Dad says you are really Ginger. Is it true?”
Although, I do have to point out that both Dad and my brother grow beards with a high Ginger content.

Thanks to the Human Genome Project and other research we know that Ginger people have 2 copies of a recessive gene. This gene is on chromosome 16 and causes a change in the MC1R protein.
All very clever, but locating the gene for Alzheimer’s or Cancer may be more useful.

The Greeks and Romans wrote of ‘Red Headed’ peoples and tribes.
Boudica was described as having “a great mass of red hair… over her shoulders.”Then there is the association that red heads have fiery tempers.
I’d have to say that ATM had one of those!
That could be a self fulfilling prophecy though.
I have brown and grey hair and my temper can be epic.

Elizabeth I was a red head and for a time it was fashionable.
Painters appear to be champions of the Red head.
Titian red.
Botticelli’s Venus is red and the Pre-Raphaelites didn’t seem to mind a Ginge.
Then again, it has been argued that artists themselves have helped with the prejudice.
Red was Satan’s colour.
Judas and Mary Magdalene have been portrayed as red heads.
Folklore describes red heads as ‘the Devil’s children’ or helpers.

You’d think we’d be a bit beyond that shit now wouldn’t you?
So, I'm coming out.

I must carry at least one of the 2 recessive genes and have a fiery temper.
I’m a “Stealth Ginger”!
Being childless I have saved some poor bastard a daily beating at school.
The equation for that one is:
Ginger Kid + Lesbian Mother = No Fucking Chance.

Then the wonders of scientific research bring us this.
Right, ok.
That works because the human and worm systems are so similar?
Yes?
Crisp-e.. Science stuff, do your ‘splaining thing!

On a totally unrelated note.
Are people with lisps any better at oral sex?
I surfed into a programme called ‘A Girl’s Guide to 21st Century Sex’ and one of the women giving advice had a lisp.
It was just a thought that popped in to my head.
Particularly difficult one to research.

11 comments:

Sassygril said...

It's the Gary Megson effect and the coming weekend fixtures will feature a number of celebrity ginge's such as David Moyes. It's football that's hardwired into your head mate - as well as the other!

Crisp-e said...

These people have far too much time on their hands!
Why would they want to research that? We don’t need a scientific conclusion to accept that homosexuality exists, has probably always existed and will continue to exist so long as there are animals on the planet! It’s a shame, however, that the ginger gene is equally persistent.

Sleepy said...

Sassy.. It is true that football is hardwired into my head!

Crisp-e.. I think you maybe sharing bedspace with a 'Stealth Ginge'!

Crisp-e said...

lol! I know this.

Sleepy said...

You may be the possessor of such a gene!
Think what you could unleash!

Sleepy said...

Neither of you have been much help with the Lisp question I notice!

Sassygril said...

Given that I was depicted as a raving hetero, I thought that I would give that one a miss.

Although it does pose an interesting research question. But I share your view that it would be a hard one to actualise. Not sure it would get past the University ethics committee!

Sleepy said...

Sassy.. Men have Lisps.
They can't say it! But they have 'em!

Schneewittchen said...

Oi, you lot, leave it out! Ginger hair rocks!!! My boy is one of the loveliest in the planet!

Sleepy said...

Schnee.. He doesn't count! And I thought I was being positive!

Sleepy said...

More importantly, what's your experience with 'Lispers'?..

Hehehe!