Please Release Me

‘I can’t sleep, something’s all over me
Greasy, insomnia please release me
And let me dream about making mad love on the Heath,
tearing off tights with my teeth
But there’s no relief
I’m wide awake in my kitchen
It’s dark and I’m lonely
Oh, if I could only get some sleep.’

Faithless - Insomnia

The insomnia is biting again.
I had a horrendous night last night.
Not really sleep, just a series of fifteen minute naps.
At one point my nose was whistling with each breath, sounding like a distant trumpeting elephant.
It even annoyed Kenny the Cat.
He put one paw on my cheek and batted my nose with another.
Then I became aware of how noisy the duvet is every time I move.
It’s new and sounds like it has been filled with Crunchy Nut Cornflakes.
My Sooper Dooper, designed by NASA, good for your back, indestructible pillow is banjaxed.
Never loses its shape?
Bollocks.
Mine looks like it has been tied in a reef knot.
At about 5am the magpies started their hideous noise.
I’m tempted to get an air pistol but I will try the ‘Spud’ gun and a catapult first.

This afternoon I lost my temper so badly I’m still not over it.
It’s like I’m carrying a cannon ball of mercury in the pit of my stomach, my hands are shaking and my jaw aches from grinding my teeth.
Usually, I’m a ‘smasher up-er’.
I’ve lost count of the number of ashtrays, glasses and mugs that have been launched into the fireplace; Furniture I’ve beaten with hammers and windows I’ve put my fists through.
This afternoon I couldn’t find anything to destroy.
It seems I like my stuff at the moment.
I found the axe but no wood.
So the rage is just sitting there, seething, waiting.
I detest feeling like this. It is such a weakness.
Hopefully, a few more joints and it’ll come out, like the bloke in the Green Mile.
Just dissipate into the ether.

On a gentler note.
I collected over thirty Ladybirds from the railings at the front of Sleepy Mansions.
They are now in the back garden munching their way through the plague of Aphids out there.
I swept the forecourt and front of the house, which was ankle deep in leaves.
When it rains they get slippery and are fecking treacherous bastards.
(I refer you to the ‘Splits’ incident of an earlier post!)
I did next door as well.

But… I’m still off kilter. Poxy temper.